I never sleep alone. I sleep with my guitar.

Willie Nelson. Period.

What do you say about someone as prolific an icon as Willie.

I want to be him.

And in some ways I am.

But I will never be Willie Nelson.

I will be me but I sure as hell love Willie Nelson.

I have several music legends that I aspire to and are music influences. But Willie is different. It more than just his 50 years of play-list unending On the Road gems of songs. It more than just his lyrics.

It is Willie.

He is the brand. His personality and his heart are what drew me to him as a 17 year old sneaking into a 6th Street bar in Austin Texas in 1977. You could drink at 18 back then, but I wasn’t 18. So I faked like I was the dishwasher and came in the alley door. I put on an apron and started to fill the sink.

That’s when I heard it.


17 times in one night.

Since that night and now 40 years later I still love to hear Whiskey River.

I have two guitars. One is at my mama’s house and one sleeps with me.

Jolene is my Washburn 6 string guitar, that is missing the G string. I could of had it fixed but it makes a kinda unique sound that I like on some songs. So not so melodic but more of a harder twang. (picture later)

Spot is my 1970 Ventura (Gibson design made in Japan) a numbered series. I learned how to play this guitar in Kentucky from a pig farmer that played the banjo. This is the one that sits in New Braunfels, Texas at my mama’s house. It’s going to cost me $350 to ship it up here to Alaska. It cost $100 in 1970. (picture later)


I was 14 working on the family farm in Kentucky. Tobacco and Cows. That was all we know. But 30 acres of tobacco base and 120 milk cows and a few bulls and steers was the livelihood and lifestyle for three families. We are talking Northern KY just near Lenoxville. About 45 minutes south of Cincinnati and 45 minutes north of Lexington. it was a 250 acre farm with mostly bushes and trees and hills. All the places that a young active COW-DOG would love to explore.

Yep. My nickname was COW-DOG cuz my job was to scout out and round up the cows every day for milking time.

But at age 14

I found something that became the obsession of my life for the next 45 years.

Farm Girls.

It was at the Grange for a non-alcoholic square dance. i didn’t drive a truck but I drove a Ford 2000 tractor the 5 miles down the road to the grain feed where the dance was.

walking in the door fresh off the boat from Texas I spied the prettiest girl in the world.

She knows her name.

I said, “Hi, I’m Lance from TEXAS!”

That was all it took. We were best pals. She was 17 and had a truck. I said i got a tractor.

That summer I learned about the three things that are still the best part of my life.


Yep. I went down on the farm. Specifically the stripping house at the old barn up the road. it was raining hard. no beans to snap. i ran all the way in the rain following the hollow across a hill.

She was already there. A hayloft with fescue salted down hay. it was warm. a steel roof made the raindrops sound like atomic bombs. I had shit on my boots so i took them off.

She had already taken off her shoes and pants and was just standing there with a long shirt for a night-gown. i never seen anything like that ever before in all my life.

Oh my a flower of such sweet proportions and a bean. flower and bean.

That all she said. Flick the bean and Pick the flower. And whenever we wanted to meet up or say something like I love you and want to make love to you all night. we couldn’t just say that or aunt and uncle might catch a clue.

So we just said, want to snap some beans. Yeah i love flickin bean.

And that is how i learned how to go down on the farm. Hence my first EP is called and all about learning oral sex on a 17 year old hillbilly girl in KY. i was 14. now i wasn’t gonna be playing ball with the boys anymore.

Now I’m in Alaska wishing i was on the farm.


Today is ONE YEAR since I sold everything I have in life in the way of possessions and moved to Alaska. I moved to Alaska to become a AK WRITER. Aug 2018 I produced my first music EP called Going Down On The Farm.

Someone asked me why didn’t I move to Austin just one hour away. I mean that is besides Nashville a Country Rock Blues mecca. That is where all the professional musicians and recording companies are located.


There are over 1000 Willie Nelsons and 500 Stevie Ray Vaughns in Austin Texas.

In Alaska I am the only one.

Also, I have mental health problems. I am bipolar with PTSD. One of the best cures for PTSD is weed. Smoke Weed in Austin sure. But keep it to yourself or you go to jail.

I moved to Alaska to become a writer that smokes weed. Another moody musician that smokes weed. That is what Bipolar420 is all about. Google it. #bipolar420 and see what you see.

I have been single for 10 years now and I like it.  I just met a remarkable woman from Moscow that loves me for me.

So while for the last 10 years I have slept with Jolene. Soon I am going to have to put the guitar by the side of the bed and make room for my girl.

That is me.

That is why I play music.

I play music so i can flick bean.

And someday soon I won’t be sleeping with my guitar. i be flickin bean all night long.

Here BTW is Willie Nelsons story of his guitar “Trigger” my hero.

Maybe that’s it. Willie got trigger. i got Jolene, Spot and Bean. (my girlfriends nickname is bean, she calls me Santa Boris)

Author: bbqdad

pilot poet dad "I can open a pickle jar with my bare hands!"

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