This is Lance “BBQDAD“ Merrick and as you may know I have bipolar disorder and PTSD. It has been an illness I have had to deal with for 40 years. It has only been in the last three years that I’ve been taking medicine to treat my symptoms. Luckily I found something that works for me.
I have also learned techniques to use to calm my spirit and anxiety. I use music, meditation and meds.
One of the medicines I use to treat my symptoms is cannabis. I use it everyday as a sleep aid and for relaxation.
I want to thank you for following me and especially some that I have become closer friends as you have responded and shared your own personal stories with me. We have laughed, we have cried and found support.
Now, I feel like I owe it to you to get even more personal so that we can build a stronger connection.
I want to create a community that supports each other.
But there is one thing that needs to happen before there is any community.
You have to trust me.
I feel like in order to win your trust in me I am going to have to open up my life in ways beyond what I have already shared already. It is not enough to write nice articles and lists of “How To“ which you can find many other places on the web. The only way I will be able to stand out is to share myself from the depths of my pain and my soul.
To quote Hemingway “you must bleed on the page”.
I asked myself how do I do this?
What type of format should I use?
Then I came up with an idea.
I am going to write a book. I will post very personal stories about my mishaps and successes in the format of a love story between me and a girl that I knew in college. In this story you will feel the struggle that both of us had managing our symptoms, She was bipolar too and taught me what it meant before I was even diagnosed.
So with that being said, I have published my first chapter of the book entitled:
“How Willie Nelson Triggered My First Manic Episode | A Life’s Journey With Bipolar”
I plan to post each chapter as they are written, and allow you to look over my shoulder and see my heart on the page. This will be very hard for me to drum up memories that hurt and do it in an entertaining and educational way.
My style and tone will continue to be like we are sitting down for a cup of coffee and I am telling you a story. I want you personally to be right there with me so you can see my heart and hear the pain.
I want us to laugh together when it is possible and celebrate the victories together.
That is my promise to myself and to you.
What I want from you is to engage a little more by commenting and asking questions along the way. This will guide me to the topics to touch on and also to hear how you relate with your own stories.
So keep in touch and follow me if you are not already one of my followers and enjoy the ride!